I was supposed to be walking out the door. Instead, I slumped to the ground, my back against the door of the bathroom. The door was firmly locked and I could hear my kids scrambling to find their shoes and backpacks and lunches. Tears dripped down my face.
I was at a breaking point. How could I go on like this?
So much swirling in my brain. So many different areas of life to juggle and now it felt like all those balls had fallen the floor. I had dropped them all.
How on earth was I supposed to do everything? How could I keep up with the intensity of raising 4 little kids and also grow my little company? My whole life felt like one step forward, two steps back. I could never get ahead.
On the bathroom floor, I cried out desperately to God for help. "You have to help me figure this out!" Choking out a sob, I let the tears flow. I had to release all the emotions that threatened to strangle me. After a few minutes on my knees, I wiped away my tears, checked my makeup in the mirror, and bravely walked out into the chaos of the entryway. "Time to go!" my voice sang in a false bravado. As I drove, I gripped the steering wheel and continued to pray for answers. "I can't keep living like this," I muttered under my breath. "You have to help me."
Change doesn't come immediately. It's like the changing of the fall colors--you see glimpses, but it's a slow process. Little by little, I started to turn the ship around. I got a steady babysitter to come once a week so I could work ON my business, and not just IN it. I focused on marketing and advertising--so I could get more clients in the door. I spent hours and hours selecting the right staff members that I could trust and train to take tasks off my plate. I put firm boundaries in place and gently said "no" to activities and phone calls so I could focus what I should be doing. (I even emailed my family and closest friends and let them know my schedule--so they could help me stick to it!) I assigned tasks to specific days. Monday was clean the house day and spend time with the kids. Tuesday was staff meeting and client work. Wednesday was dedicated to working on marketing and my website. Thursday was meetings and getting big tasks done to move my business forward. Friday was family day.
Slowly my life transformed. I saw glimmers of hope. I didn't feel so stressed. I made a choice to be fully present with my children and fully engaged in work when the allotted time for work came around. As a result, my company grew. My children were happier. I was more at peace. (And when work ideas popped into my head while I was with my kids, I just jotted them down and saved it for later.)
I committed to dating my spouse regularly. We made it a priority to have a meal together and hang out and laugh and talk one-on-one at least once a week. Joy crept back into my life.
That breaking point was 5 years ago. I'll never forget that day in the bathroom. Something shifted inside of me and I brought my business to God like never before. He was faithful to give me ideas and tools and wisdom and guidance. Every day I still have to come to Him for help. There's no way I can do this on my own. I need coaches and friends and books, and I never stop learning.
If you're feeling completely alone and overwhelmed, reach out for help.
We can help you with your marketing and systems and time management. You can join our coaching program and finally move forward out of this mess. Simply making the decision that something has to change can shift your life in a way you never knew was possible. Just reply to this or click here (https://www.neveralonebusinessservices.com/get-to-know-you.html) to set up a time to talk. Together, we'll figure out a plan. You don't have to travel this road alone--there are others who want to encourage and help you. You really don't have to do it all alone. Let's talk soon. ((hugs))
Do you have a deep aching for something that's missing in your life? Maybe it's traveling or moving to a bigger house. Maybe you wish you could just jump in your car and drive and drive and never come back.
I get it.
There was a time in my life that I was so tempted to just leave everything behind and go start over somewhere.
If you feel frustrated and even angry, LISTEN to those emotions. Those are cues that things need to change. Use that deep determination to accomplish your goals. Do the next right thing. The next task. Put one foot in front of the other. Persevere. Don't give up.
No, there's not a magic pill to fix everything.
Goals are accomplished by just doing what you can, with what you have, where you are.
I know you know this, but we all need encouragement and a reminder sometimes.
Did you know? Teddy Roosevelt's men were in the middle of war when they requested more men! More ammunition! More supplies! He replied with the now-famous words, "Do what you can, with what you have, where you are." I love that. We all have tools right in front of us. Opportunities. Skills and talents. Your big dreams are slightly disconnected to your next right step. You NEED the big goals, yes, but you need to know the next 3 tiny steps that you need to take on your journey. Look down. What's right in front of you? What can you do right now today? What are you procrastinating on? What are you avoiding? Go do it!!
Maybe you juggling everything on your own. Are you getting burned out from working all the time?
The only way you'll ever get to the next level is if you delegate, simplify, automate, or eliminate certain tasks. You simply can't continue on at this pace. You can't do it all alone. Reach out for help. (Yes, it takes time to get help for that project, or to hire that assistant or nanny. But it's WORTH IT.)
Use your deep aching and longing for change to create a determination that you WILL succeed. And you will. Use your frustration and anger to propel you forward! It's there for a reason! You are MADE to do the things you long for! Those desires are in there for a reason.
I believe in you! You can do this. One foot in front of the other.
Just one step at at time.
Yesterday I made my morning coffee and reached beyond my favorite red coffee cups to one in the back. It was chipped, but held memories of the years when my kids were all babies and I was working SO HARD to grow my company. The coffee cup was a gift from a Mary Kay lady--it has motivating quotes all around the mug and even on the inside. For a couple years, I used that cup every day and as I sipped my coffee, I reflected on the words: "If it's to bee, it's up to me."
Now, I believe in God and He definitely guides and helps me, and of course my husband helps me, too. But ultimately, I am responsible for the actions in my life. I am the only one that can choose the direction I am headed. I believe in personal accountability, and during those years when I had to cut coupons for everything and make meals stretch so I could stay in our grocery budget, I knew it was MY responsibility to sneak in work during every nap and every evening when the kids were (finally) in bed so I could keep moving my business in the right direction.
Yesterday, my eyes welled up with tears as I held that coffee cup and remembered how far I've come. I'm so thankful for the years when I pushed HARD to grow my business. I worked to multiply myself by hiring staff, I studied marketing and copywriting to improve my ads, I studied web-based tools to make my systems more powerful and streamlined, and I never quit believing that my little side business could explode into supporting our family and allow us to travel multiple times a year.
If you feel alone, we are here to support you. If you are hustling every day to grow your company, I'm telling you--I understand!
Here's how we can help.
We can improve your website so it converts visitors into customers.
We can improve your web presence so when people Google you, they find you.
We can create print materials that mirror your website so you have something to put in the mail when prospects call or email you.
Or, we can coach you through the process while you make all theses improvements on your own. Yes, the success of your company is in YOUR hands. But you do not have to walk alone. We've been in your shoes. We know how crazy busy you are. Just email or call us and we'll help you get to the next level faster.
Now, I have to go get some more coffee.
About the Author
Hi, I'm Jen Hickle!